This past Sunday we made our move from Utah to Oregon. Without going into a lot of detail... basically yesterday I was in a major funk...and it had only been day 4 of living in Oregon thus far. My funk was rooted from getting burned out of hours upon hours of painting our house and not feeling like we made a dent. All the rooms are dark wood paneling. We live amoung 100 ft. douglas firs that provide a ton of shade...so brightening up our home, as well as covering the cigarette smoke smell from the previous owner is kind of a must...a first priority must. That, mixed with living without our things [our pod doesn't arrive till next tues.] started to really eat away at me, get in a mental stupor and start to doubt moving to Oregon, buying this house...bla bla bla bob lawbla. :-p .. thankfully, I'm married to someone who is pretty level headed and calm 100% of the time. After me talking my frustrations out, figuring out what is causing me anxiety and what is the best way to manage it...I went to bed feeling better about the situation.
This morning when I woke up, I had Charlie Chaplin's lyrics "Smile" playing over and over in my head:
Smile though your heart is aching
Smile even though it's breaking
When there are clouds in the sky, you'll get by
If you smile through your fear & sorrow
SMILE & maybe tomorrow
you'll see the sun come shining through for you
I like the second to last line of this stanza "smile...& MAYBE tomorrow" I was thinking about how that "maybe" is all up to me...
replaying me and Jesse's conversation in my head from the night before, and remembering what we had talked about. I was feeling hopeful and happy that I could make today better than yesterday, but also ashamed that I let my emotions get the best of me. I know that it will probably happen again, i'm not perfect...I was also humbled this morning while playing these lyrics in my head... I said to myself:
"Roxy, your issues and struggles...yes, they are valid but they could be a lot worse...do you want them to be worse?
Me answering to myself: No...no, I don't want any major struggles right now...
Sensible self: "okay...well keep in mind that there are those around you that are going through some REAL stuff right now, the kind of stuff that is heartbreaking, the kind of stuff that you loose sleep over, the kind of stuff where you wonder why..."
That's when I was feeling embarrassed... :/ and then the thought came to me to make a little pick me up video...not only for myself when i'm in the not-legit funk but for those who are really in a funk, or going through a sad trial where seeing the light at the end of the tunnel almost seems impossible... telling Jesse my idea and with his help and video expertise we made this video for you or anyone out there in need of a big smile and hug, I hope it brings some sort of happiness to your day.
Love, Roxy :]